I ran across the picture and it just cracks me up. What a great and creative angle. It really sums up how I feel right now. I have been somewhat preoccupied yesterday and last night after reading a thread of the Bethany Board about attachment. I keep going over and over in my mind, what if I don't get it right, what if I miss something, what if Jadyn has attachment issues that I don't recognize, and every other question rolling around in my head. I guess you can say that I feel like I'm "freaking out" on the inside. For those that know me well, you know that I wouldn't show it on the outside. Is this normal to feel this way coming down to the wire? I have waited so long for this and I just don't want to mess it up. I read of severe attachment issues and I read peoples blogs that say their issues are very minimal. I think that it is safe to say that all instutionalized children have suffered a break in the attachment cycle and will have some issues and I recognize and believe this, but I can't help but be worried about missing something. Maybe I just need reassurance, maybe I just need encouragement, maybe I just need to use THAT bathroom at the Great Wall!
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
When you gotta go, you gotta go!
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3 comments:
i still deal with this. i have had to come to the realization that it really doesn't matter if they have attachment disorder because it doesn't change your commitment to them. you are commiting to love jayden and even if she never loves you back the way you or i think she should...it won't really matter. you are not going to break your commitment to her. i know that it is so scarey but once you get her- the questions won't really matter anymore. you are really in the hardest part of the adoption process right now. i bet you have learned alot about God and yourself through this...i would love to hear about that part of it if you get a chance to write about that.
Thanks my friend, I needed to hear that. Amy
i am sure i have told you this before, but this little girl in China whose face you long to see and whose little arms you ache to touch was meant to be your daughter just like seth/zach were meant to be your sons. she may have some issue, but don't we all. as a family you will work through it and be stronger and closer to God for it. i can't wait to meet the sassy little princess!!!!
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