Coming Soon - What I have Learned

I am attempting to put together my thoughts on the lessons that I have been taught over the past two years and even beyond. I am going to post some of the things that God has taught me during this very difficult time in hopes that someone, somewhere may benefit from those lessons. So, stay tuned for the real truth, some of which is pretty and some of which is not so pretty.

When you gotta go, you gotta go!

I ran across the picture and it just cracks me up. What a great and creative angle. It really sums up how I feel right now. I have been somewhat preoccupied yesterday and last night after reading a thread of the Bethany Board about attachment. I keep going over and over in my mind, what if I don't get it right, what if I miss something, what if Jadyn has attachment issues that I don't recognize, and every other question rolling around in my head. I guess you can say that I feel like I'm "freaking out" on the inside. For those that know me well, you know that I wouldn't show it on the outside. Is this normal to feel this way coming down to the wire? I have waited so long for this and I just don't want to mess it up. I read of severe attachment issues and I read peoples blogs that say their issues are very minimal. I think that it is safe to say that all instutionalized children have suffered a break in the attachment cycle and will have some issues and I recognize and believe this, but I can't help but be worried about missing something. Maybe I just need reassurance, maybe I just need encouragement, maybe I just need to use THAT bathroom at the Great Wall!

Anyone for Sushi?

For those of you that know me well, you know once I have something in my mind there is no stopping me. I will drive 500 miles just to find one thing. Well, one of my most recent missions has been the Great Sushi Set Search of 06! I saw this "Melissa and Doug" wooden sushi set on line and felt in my heart that Jadyn "must" have one. It was way too much on line so I began my hunt. I had a few shops that I knew that sold Melissa and Doug toys but I kept coming up empty handed. Just when I had resolved that I was going to "have" to pay that ridiculous price, I found it at the Peanut Gallery in Murfreesboro. Woo Hoo! It is so cute. The sushi rolls velcro together so you can put the together and then "cut" them apart to serve. The chopsticks have velcro on the ends of them so you can easily pick the "sushi" up. It also has a bowl of soy sauce, wasabi and ginger slices. It really is too cute for words. Guess you can tell that it don't take much to excite me these days.

Fun with Addie!

Just before Christmas, we got the priviledge of keeping Addie Mei for Dick and Leslie. She was a blast. I told Pat that we must look ridiculous as we sat in chairs (all three of us, Pat, Zac and myself) just watching her eat in her (actually Jadyn's) highchair. Can you imagine? Oh well, here are a few pictures from the night that I am just now blogging. What a great time we had. It was a true joy and she loves egg nog. I don't think that they served it back at "the home" :)

A Little Bummed!

Well, the new cut-off date is 9/27/05. I really had hoped for the rest of the month, or at least through the 29th of September, but no go. I am not at all surprised, but I guess a little disappointed. This means that we will probably not get our referral until sometime in February or even into the first or March. I don't look for the next cut-off to go much into October. Even though there is more days in this batch, this is still considerably less LID's that they have previously been processing. I am still searching for the lesson that God is teaching me!!!!!

What do I Know?

Nothing, absolutely nothing at this point. I am still diligently praying that 9/29 is included in this batch that is due to hit the states today. We need it to and we need it to BAD!!! Keep on praying. This is HUGE for us. There are conflicting rumors, but it's not looking too good right now.

Happy New Year!

Yes, I know that I'm a day late, that is usually how it works for me. But, here's hoping we hear some wonderful referral news today. There is a European agency that has already confirmed that their 9/27/05 people are in. We REALLY NEED for this batch to go through the end of September. Get busy praying! More later as the excitement unfolds! Just a thought, what if we get a call today and our LID has been changed? Stranger things have happened you know! :)

Stop the Madness!

Things continue to be crazy in the world of adoption. There have been several families who had LID's past 9/8/05 who have received their referrals in the last batch. I have seen one as late at 9/15/05. Talk about a surprise. How wild would that be? I really think that we are on target for February. However, there is a slim chance that we could get ours in January. This has been a crazy process and just think, the fun is just beginning.

CCAA Update

Well, here you go, hot off the press. We're through September 8th. Not where I expected to be this month. I'm pretty disappointed, but, not much I can do. We are getting closer, inch by inch.

No news is... No news

Nada, zilch, nothing. Lots and lots of conflicting rumors (I emphasize the word rumors)that are pointing to a million different directions. Once again, we are up in the air. We'll just have to wait and see for ourselve when referrals arrive. Oh, and the rumors about the arrival of referrals are all over the place too. So, the moral of that story is "don't pay attention to rumors". Right?

No news is good news? Right?

Happy Monday! It's the beginning of a brand new week and boy was it hard to get out of bed this morning. I don't even think that I set the clock last night. I can't remember. There is nothing new on the adoption front this morning, we are all waiting not so patiently for any bit of rumor that comes our way.

I am praying that we know something soon and if you need something to pray for, pray that all of September is included in this next batch of referrals. Now, that would be excited. Maybe they are still matching and we just haven't heard yet because of that. One can dream!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Wow, what I am thankful for? The list goes on and on. I am thankful for my wonderful husband, who is my best friend. I am thankful for our boys. I am thankful for the little girl who waits on us in China. Our life is getting ready to be turned upside down. We can't wait.

So, today, as I reflect on Thanksgiving past, and look forward to future Thanksgivings, I pray that now, as our daughter sleeps somewhere in China, that God will warm her heart today, whisper our voices in her ear, and hold her in His arms while she sleeps. We love you Jadyn, sleep well sweet daughter, we will come get you soon. For you, I am forever thankful.

Hey, we got one!

There is a great rumor on RQ this morning. I woke up to some exciting news. She says that there are some agencies that are saying we will see either all or almost all of September in this next batch. Now that's exciting! Pray that it happens, although, I am not getting my hopes up. I have been on that roller coaster before and it's not a fun ride.

Yesterday, all my troubles seem so far away!

Yesterday was the 13 month anniniversary of our LID. We were actually logged in for 13 months. WOW, that is just hard for me to believe. I can't help but think that good news is right around the corner. I can't wait to find out about the next batch of referrals, which by the way, there is no rumors floating around about at all.

I really might have my expectations a little high, but who knows. I think we will see sweet Jadyn's face the end of January. Yep, that's what keeps me awake at night (see the posted time) and that's what motivates me during the day. The thoughts of seeing her sweet face. God, love on her today and she waits for us in China.

At Last! Can I Get an AMEN!

Ladies and Gentlemen: We have a cut-off date! The CCAA website is updated and they have processed through August 25, 2005. This is pretty significant. According to the word on the street, August 24th was a HUGE day of LID's so to have gotten through this day alone is BIG. And, besides that, they got through one more day past it. I'll get a little information later (like when the sun comes up) that will let us know exactly how significant. Until then, I think I will go back to bed and try to sleep a little tonight, just because it's dark outside and that is what NORMAL people do this time of the day.

Can I get an AMEN!!!

Can I Have a Do-Over?

We have managed to wait so long that we are having to redo our paperwork for the immigration service. Out I171H, which is our approval to bring an orphaned child into the states expires on 2/15/07 and it must be valid through travel. Quite frankly, I don't think that ours will be, so here we go again.

We must be refingerprinted (FBI), which we have already done, to the tune of $210.00 and then onward to more papers. We are required to have an update on our homestudy, new police clearance letters, new financial statements, new medical exams (all of us), and report of our taxes from last year. We are required to have a face to face meeting with our social worker, which Pat and I are doing Wednesday morning. We have to go downtown to Bethany's office, with paperwork in hand, give her our updated information, a check for $545.00 and when our updated paperwork returns from immigration, we're good for another 18 months. Lord, please don't let it take that long!!

Yes, I am awake again in the middle of the night, and tonight I am thinking of everything that has to be redone. Random, huh? Maybe one day I will sleep normally again, who knows? I guess I'll sleep better just in time to be awaken by a 1 year old.

help

See how weak that cry for help was, no capitalization even. I have absolutely no clue what is going to with referrals. There is no information and nothing on the horizon. All I know, is that I am going nuts. I am stumped by the CCAA as to what is going on. I don't know if this is a good sign or a terrible sign. What I am so afraid of is that we are going to wait and wait and wait and then the update will be only through August 12th or 15th or something absurd like that. I am clueless, speechless, and every other less that you can think of.

Pray that we will get good news. I am so discouraged and frustrated. It is a tough road and I know that you have all heard it before, all the time in fact, but it really sucks (I hate that word but that is the best one to describe it) and I can't help it. Oh well, there is not a whole lot that I can do, except continue to pray. Thanks and I will post when I have new info.

Whoda thunk it?

Well, here it is 3:32 in the morning (which of course begs the question "why are you not asleep?") and there is still no word on referrals. What is up with that? I cannot believe that we have heard nothing. There has been a REALLY good rumor floating around that said that a European agency has told someone with a 10/24 LID that they would have their referral by Christmas. I can't even let my emotions go there. I got a lump in my throat and choked up a little when Pat first read it to me, but then I had to get my emotions and my racing mind in check. Oh well, I guess we will see what this batch holds.

They are going to have to do some major speeding up and catching up for that to happen. But, stranger things have happened. Wouldn't it be amazing to have a picture of our sweet Jadyn's face for Christmas. Wow, it leaves me speechless.

Long time, no post!

Well, I would love to have something to update, but there is just nothing out there yet. The word on the street is that COP lists are in the states, but of course our agency don't know any thing about it. There is talk of some moving and shuffling of LID's, but again, our agency hasn't heard anything about it. Referrals are expected to hit the states sometime this week and there is no real idea about the cutoff except that it is going to be sometime between 8/23 and 8/28. So, there you have it, like I said, nothing real to report. I'll post as soon as I know something and begin hearing about referrals. We do feel, however, that we are getting closer and that we are on the down hill side of this now. Keep praying.

Time is ticking!

Well, time is passing and it seems to be passing a little quicker these days. We are very busy and this weekend was no exception. I directed a wedding on Friday night, left for Knoxville after the wedding and stayed with Amanda, Jeremy and Will in Knoxville. We went to Asheville on Saturday evening for my niece Stacy's wedding, went to Church Hill after that wedding, Pat preached at FBC Church Hill on Sunday morning, went to a birthday party for Will after church and came home (FINALLY!) to eat dinner and sleep in my own bed (WOOHOO!). It was a whilrwind weekend but it causes the days to go by quickly. Today, it's back to our regular routine. Check out the picture of the beautiful bag that my friend Terri Fleming made for Jadyn. She sent it to me a few weeks ago and I am thrilled beyond measure. I can't wait to carry it everywhere I go with Jadyn of course!

Have a great day all!
Amy